Friday, October 30, 2009

Friday caption contest, in to the gutter quickly

This could head in to the gutter rather quickly, so try to be creative before jumping to the obvious!



I'll start out...

"Damn, I know they said running tubeless at too high of a pressure would blow the tires off the rim, but this is ridiculous!"

Post your caption!

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

The tale of Skunky, the ass-in-the-air descender

Perfect Skunky position, front low, tail in the air

While Skunky can be either gender, "she" is used for this example.

Skunky can be found near the back of the pack in mountain bike races.

Skunky has grasped the concept of getting off of the seat while going downhill, however she locks her legs and stands tall with her front low. This is very attractive for mating, but not so effective for technical descending as the legs are not used as shock absorbers in this instance.

Skunky is a better-than-average climber and often yells things like, "come on!" and "I can't believe I'm getting stuck behind this!" or "get moving!", while battling on the climbs for near last place in beginner. Everyone would empathize with Skunky, if it weren't for this annoying habit. Any places Skunky gains on the climb are lost during descents.

Skunky usually won't yield the trail when faster descenders happen upon her, causing overtakers to maneuver the gnarly rough nasty stuff on the trail edge, more than likely because of frustration from passing them uphill only to be passed when it turns downward. She will often quote race directors and angrily yell, "races aren't won on the downhill asshole!", another annoying trait that makes people not feel sorry for Skunky.

Skunky can usually be found wearing knickers on an 80 deg day and is often riding alone. While it has never been confirmed, leading experts believe Skunky probably runs her tires at the maximum recommended pressure regardless of the course. With a little coaching it is possible that Skunky may be one day graduate to being so far behind the seat on the slightest of downhills that her bum may touch the rear tire, a huge improvement over her current position.

A pair of skunks in perfect Skunky position
While the position is correct, Skunky is rarely seen with another Skunky in the wild

Not a picture of Skunky

Monday, October 26, 2009

L.A.P.D.A.N.C.E.

Everyone gets to their breaking point, and the lemming finally got to his. That's why he has started L.A.P.D.A.N.C.E., which unfortunately means Lemming Against Previews Done As Newly Created Entries and not something more exciting. If anyone joins him the Lemming can become plural, at that point it will become L.A.P.D.A.N.C.E. - Lemmings Against Previews Done As Newly Created Entries. To be technical, this means setting your "RSS Feed" to be preview only and forcing people to go to your site to read the rest, that is BAD.

This all started because it's nearly impossible to go individually to every blog that the lemming wants to read, especially if he is doing his blog reading at work where "the man" keeps a watchful eye on him to keep him down and see if he's being productive. It's much easier to read full content in a "feed reader" and therefore fool "the man" that he might be working.

This all came to a head when the lemming thought the BikeSnobNYC, the grand poobah of cycling bloggers, had gone to preview feeds and thus had become a LAPDANCEe... A quick note to the Snob revealed he wasn't, he was simply having trouble with his feed updating and really wanted the full content in the feed. Unfortunately, not everyone has followed his lead.

In case you do not know what I'm talking about, here is an example of a preview feed:

This weekend kicked ass! I had the sickest ride of my life, I've never seen singletrack this buff! I was killing it! I even ran in to Alison Starnes. Here are all the pictures I took.....

[For pictures and the rest of the blog, please visit the full site at (insert blog name) here. If you are at work and can't go to the site because your boss is a soul-robbing lunatic too bad.]


A typical day when trying to read preview feeds, note the angry boss


A happy blog reader, reading all blogs in a feed reader


Nothing sends the point home like famous quotations, that's why I've taken some historical quotes completely out of context and massaged them to fit my selfish purposes of convincing you to do a full feed vs a preview feed.

"Ask not what your blog readers can do for you, but what you can do for your blog readers."
"We counted on our blog readers to be passive, we counted wrong."

"Content makes poor men rich; discontentment makes rich men poor."


"My favorite toast is rye toast."


A couple of readers wrote to the lemming with solutions for preview feeds, but it all sounded way more difficult than his tiny mind could grasp. If you have previously been doing preview feeds in your blog don't be ashamed, you didn't know, just change it now and we'll forget all about it. I hope these fantastic arguments have convinced you to join L.A.P.D.A.N.C.E. and that preview feeds are BAD, I can't take anymore of the lemming's complaining.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Friday fun, the picture roundup

Kick back because today's post is going to be a long one... I haven't done a Friday Fun picture roundup in awhile and let me tell you, I have a lot of pictures that I've been marking as I read Friends of the Lemming blogs which I figure I should get up here for everyone to enjoy.

But first, let's talk about Race Across the Sky. I kinda dogged on it a few weeks ago, but I did go and see it last night. I still stick with my initial analysis that it was over dramatized, and while difficult, it is just a race and there are certainly much harder ones out there. However, the movie was great and I'm happy to see the little mining town of Leadville getting the economic boost from Lance being there. Cycling could use more movies put together like this...



Still, as I watched the movie I couldn't help but think Ken Chlouber looks familiar. His man-crush on Lance was quite obvious and out there for everyone to see, touching him and giggling like a little school girl, but who doesn't swoon for a little stardom every now and then? But it's killing me, who does he remind me of?...

Hmm, maybe but not quite

Kind of, but still not quite what I was thinking...


That's it! I knew it! Station, from Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey!


I couldn't help saying "Staaaatiooooon" every time I saw him. Every time he touched Lance I was on the edge of my seat, waiting for him to morph with Lance in to one big super creature which could fix stuff really fast. But I digress...

It was also a tremendous feat that Lance rode 7 miles on a tire going flat, but I had to wonder, the guy has said he rides 7 hours a day, surely he changes his own flat every once in awhile? I mean, he can't have a team car EVERY day?

Anyway, kudos to NCM Fathom for making a highly entertaining and very well produced movie, even if they did try to go a little over the top at times.

With that I'll spare you my words and move right on to the picture roundup. Normally I'd give you some music to listen to, but since there are SO MANY to post this week AND I was mentioned on BikeSnobNYC today we'll just cut right to the chase and get some pictures out there. ENJOY!!!

Pillaged from Bicykel


Pillaged from Alison M. Starnes















Pillaged from Bike Dreams



Pillaged from Bike Rumor



Pillaged from Copenhagenize



Pillaged from Copenhagenize



Pillaged from Curtis Corlew



Pillaged from Curtis Corlew



Pillaged from Curtis Corlew



Pillaged from Cycle Goddess



Pillaged from Cycle Monkey



Pillaged from Cycle Monkey



Pillaged from Cycling Obsessions



Pillaged from DFW Point-to-Point



Pillaged from DFW Point-to-Point



Pillaged from Everyday Athlete



Pillaged from Everyday Athlete



Pillaged from Formerly Floyd Speaks



Pillaged from Formerly Floyd Speaks



Pillaged from GT in LA



Pillaged from GT in LA






Pillaged from Mellow Velo



Pillaged from Mellow Velo



Pillaged from MO7S



Pillaged from MO7S



Pillaged from OilCanRacer



Pillaged from Travels with my Mule



Pillaged from Rando Adagio



Pillaged from Road



Pillaged from Sonya Looney



Pillaged from Sonya Looney



Pillaged from Velocorapture



Pillaged from VeloLoser



Pillaged from Whirled Traveler



Pillaged from Xvelo Designs blog



Pillaged from Xvelo Designs blog


There you have them! I promise I won't keep saving them up for so long next time. As always, be safe out there, keep the rubber side down, and have one for me this weekend! I'm out...