Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Caught on tape, secret triathlon photos

It's been a great day of user submissions for the lemming. Like a shipment from Columbia House, I received a package in the mail from HTATBL Stevil's friend Robert Ives (Blue Collar bikes). Remember Columbia House? You signed up, got 12 CDs free and then had to buy 8 at over-inflated prices. You even signed up a second time using your dog's name, somehow thinking you were beating the system and that they were going to lose money from your clever scheme.

Anyway, after admitting I hadn't even heard of Minor Threat, he was kind enough to send my continuing education package and I've been listening to them on the way to my mind-numbing job all week. Details are sketchy on the price I must pay to complete my contract, but I'm putting together a few CDs to send back.

Next I received few pictures taken during a weekend triathlon from a reader who wished to remain anonymous, and these pictures are pure goodness. Watch close, this is going to get a little bumpy...

At first glance you might ask what's so peculiar about this photo. The BRIGHT orange mountain bike, the tattoos, the toe straps, the ripped-ness, the sunglasses that make him look like he's either a policeman or an army drill sergeant, or even that he's reaching behind to pull out his concealed weapon lest we find the picture funny, all of that is "normal" for a weekend triathlon. I'm amused at the great care that was taken to remove the handlebars, pull off the bar ends, the grips, the brakes, the shifters, and then put the bar ends back on in reverse. Hand position is king...


That will never get old...



This girl is killing it and getting rad! Also a part of the orange mountain bike club, she seems to take the latest trends a little far. Being a fixed gear, no brakes hipster wanna-be, but not being mechanically inclined enough to make her own fixed gear, she opted instead to go no brakes as a staunch retaliation to the system that's trying to keep her down.


They don't allow recumbents in triathlons, I'm really surprised they allow fixed gear, no brakes hipster wanna-bes!

Lastly we've got Jeff, who took to heart Men's Journal 12 weeks to your first triathlon article by Megan Michelson. With just 12 weeks and $3649, Jeff was able to complete his first triathlon in style. Note that the Men's Journal article did not discuss helmet orientation.


John, avid Men's Journal reader, aspiring to do his first triathlon in an aerodynamic tanktop


His training partner John however, wasn't as lucky. I hope I didn't lead him astray when I mentioned that Megan's expert advice of going aerodynamic with spandex didn't make sense when his cotton wife beater was pretty aerodynamic by its own admission. Sorry John, maybe Megan forgot to explain that spandex wicks moisture away from the body better than cotton, sorry...



And lastly, from the WTF files, "dude, it's your first date, look at her face, not her chest!" A Taiwanese inventor, Chen Yugang, has created a face-to-face tandem, and there is still no cure for cancer.

He had this to say about it, "On a traditional two-person bicycle, the rider in the rear seat can only see the back of the one in front. So I started wondering how I could get them sitting face-to-face."

Looks like you can ride traditinally (happy couple), face to face (new couple or that weird swinger couple who always has to tell you about their weekend), or even back to back (old married couple). "The bicycle is very easy to change. Any person can change the riding mode in around 10 seconds without the help of tools," says Chen.

Oops, Chen will explain it better, "Face-to-face is suitable for a parent and child, or dating couples, while the back-to-back mode gives both riders a good view, and the one at the back can have both hands free to shoot pictures or eat snacks." Personally I would be pretty pissed if I was up front doing all the steering and my significant other was on the back eating snacks.

Lastly, if you've made it this far, I wanted to say thanks to the small number of readers that read the crap I put out a couple times a week. I watch my site stats fairly close and take the time to read the blogs of every single reader who links to the lemming. There is some good stuff out there, and I've linked to them on the side of this blog under "Friends of the Lemming".

9 comments:

Linda said...

John is simply carboloading and hydrating for the big event. However, as appealing as it might be to draft behind someone of his size, it's a good thing drafting isn't allowed in triathlons because beer farts are lethal.

Nick said...

I'm surprised tire choice on the bikes in the tri photos. Didn't their coaches tell them to buy slicks?

mrbill said...

I'm with Nick, I ride slicks and there's a world of difference. Enjoy your blog.

Katherine Fuller said...

Whew! You had me nervous for a minute that you had dug up some old triathlon photos of mine when I was doing them on my mom's upright hybrid while wearing a red helmet with lime green lightening bolts on it (I was 12!).

And the big guy on the tri bike should wear his helmet forward. Is it just me, or does it look turned around?

Bike Lemming said...

You got it Katherine, the Men's Journal $3649, 12 week plan didn't discuss helmet orientation, plus maybe it's more aero this way.

Nick and mrbill, I was surprised by the tire choices as well. You would hope their *coaches* discussed using slicks.

Linda, I'm sure a Pig Pen-ish cloud follows John.

Anonymous said...

Thanks, BL. Here I was all concerned about the lack of aero bars on my road bike.

May 9th!!! I'll send you the race report.

Stevil said...

My soul just got a hard on.

Unknown said...

Hey Doode, you forgot pictures of me in the green shorts, wth? :)

Lucky said...

Lemming, your commentum is picking up, too. It's cool to see good comments for a good bloggeur.

Parcel pals are awesome. Wanna trade some desk crap? I'm amassing quite an emporium here.